August 18, 2015 | Posted in Andy The Everydog
It’s a bright Sunday afternoon and I’m sitting here with my humans, Ron and Betsy, and we’re all reading the New York Times.
In the magazine section, there’s a story about dog training. The dos and don’ts, basically.
I can’t tell you exactly what my lovely humans did to train me, because the job is done and everyone is happy. I know what I can and can’t do and that makes me pretty proud.
But, there’s this guy outside trying to train a new addition to his household. Believe me, my heart goes out to this dog. The first couple of times we heard his human yell, “Hey!” we thought nothing of it. On the fourth and fifth tries, we all huddled at the window to behold this sight:
This little guy — some kind of terrier mix — barks every time the human yells, “Hey”! I am now rolling around on the floor and laughing and holding my sides!
“Hey!” can mean a very loud hello or that something is burning to the ground or a kid has its finger stuck in a pencil sharpener or someone’s wallet has been stolen OR it can mean “come”. I kind of think that’s what this human is trying to accomplish but has no better way of presenting this command to his poor little dog.
Now, the human runs to the dog. Yup, still yelling “Hey!” The little guy is probably amused to see his owner running toward him and thinks it’s a game. So, he keeps running, too.
The owner now adds “C’mere” to his vocal command list. (In human translation this means “come here”.) The little guy doesn’t know what “C’mere” means, since it still kinda’ sounds like “Hey!”. He just keeps running back and forth from a tree stump to his owner, then takes off again.
Where’s a video camera when you need one, huh?!
Oh! Did I mention the owner does have a leash with him? Unfortunately, it’s not attached to the little guy, but is clenched in the owner’s hand.
This is so unfortunate. But, so funny.
Okay. Owner tries something new: “Let’s go. Now.”
Ahhhh. Of course, this is perfectly clear, is it not?
The only thing the little guy hears is “Hey! Hey! Hey!” with maybe a few more syllables.
The dog’s having a great time while his human is panting for breath.
Betsy says it’s time for dinner so we say good-bye, reluctantly, to the little show outside our door. I turn down the page with the dog training story so I can finish it later. I wish I knew where the owner and dog lived. I’d deliver it to them.
There’s always room for one more at our table, so . . . C’mere.
‘Till next time,