August 18, 2015 | Posted in Andy The Everydog
This is a very common problem for ALL of us. It isn’t rocket science, but certain people make it more complicated than it has to be.
Most of the time our humans are there to intervene on our behalf. But, if you meet humans who do the following things when they first meet you, run like you’ve just seen the Animal Control truck coming down your street!
You know the kind of human I’m talking about. You’ve never seen him or her before and they approach to say hello to your human. It was probably a very nice day and you were having a very nice walk, before you heard the dreaded call” “YOOHOO! HI THERE! I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU IN AGES!!!!” Annnnnnd . . . they’re off and running your way.
You’ll probably be on your leash, but trust me, I know you’ll want to get out of there as soon as possible. Hiding behind your human may take some of the pressure off, but that very LOUD human is still yelling and running over to see you, bellowing, “Don’t worry. I KNOW DOGS”. I’ve seen dogs who’ll lay down and put their paws over their ears, but that will only encourage this kind of person.
So, now in addition to the ear-splitting greeting from afar, the pronouncement that they KNOW dogs, they are now laughing like fools when they see you with your paws over your ears. Add “HOW CUTE!” to the list.
- PLEASE do NOT run toward us making loud sounds and crazy hand gestures! And, PLEASE, do NOT utter the most famous (or infamous) words known to canine and/or owner: “OH, DON’T WORRY. I KNOW DOGS!” No, ya’ don’t or you wouldn’t be causing such a commotion just to say hello — especially for the very first time.
- Do NOT stand right over us and stick your hand in our faces! (We smell you. We smell you. Chill.) This is not going to get us to immediately like or know you and start licking your hand.
- Do NOT start pawing us (no pun intended!) or patting us on the head. Now, you’ve made physical contact and we’re still unsure of you — or make not even like it or you!
- Please do NOT lunge to grab us in a strangling love hold!
- Do NOT eyeball us, eye to eye. It’s intimidating and we’ll back off.
- Do NOT squeal or shout endearments or anything else right into our faces.
- Do not grab our heads and plant a loud, squishy kiss on it.
Let me try to explain this in human terms: it’s like being in an elevator with a total stranger who suddenly gets real talkative, a little too touchy-feely and just plain creeps you out! Wouldn’t you feel afraid? Wouldn’t you want to defend yourself?
- Make no eye contact at all.
- Let us approach you (or not) in our own good time.
- Keep your side or back to us at first; this is a non-threatening stance.
- When/if we do sidle up to you, stroke us gently on the side of our faces or on our backs.
. . . and the rest is history.